Another year has come and gone.  I’ve had a lot of time to reflect and to see where God has brought me the past year.  I can honestly say that some events that have transpired the past year were unexpected…some were exciting, some not so exciting, some very good, and some not as good as I would have liked.  I kind of wished that some things worked out the way I wanted them to, but maybe if they did, they probably wouldn’t be as good for me as I thought they would be.  The only common denominator that brings all these things together is that throughout the year, the one true constant is God.  And, one of the primary things that He has been teaching me is that it’s all about Him…it’s not about me.

I’ve spent this year trying to understand this truth in my life…everything being all about Him.  It was a struggle ‘cause it meant that I had to let go of a lot of myself.  I had to let go of some of the desires I have for my life and to align myself to God’s desires.  That’s not an easy task, especially for someone who likes to be in charge and to plan for where I saw myself to be.  The toughest part of learning all of this is that God had to take away some things in my life…sometimes He had to do it twice, and I regret to say that some took three tries.

The thing I’ve been focused on the most lately is God’s Kingdom Building.  I’ve been leading worship music at a church in Woodland Park since last August.  The attendance is low – maybe 10-20 people each week.  I used to wonder why there weren’t more people showing up, and I used to be pretty bummed out about it.  After a couple of months, though, God had to remind me that it is all about Him and not me.  It’s not about my expectations, but about His work and His time.  Since then, I’ve been so excited just getting to know the regulars who attend and being able to praise God with them.  The cool thing about all this, too, is that God has been providing me with more confidence in the abilities He has given me…and that excites me because I believe that He isn’t done with me yet.

I’m finishing up my Master’s in Project Management this May.  I was going to write about something that has to do with spaceflight and why the US is going back to the moon, but I changed my mind and I’m now currently working on a new subject (which I should be doing right now, but I’m messin’ around with my blog instead).  I decided to change my subject to church planting and managing successful teams in a non-profit setting.  This is what I’m most passionate about; hence, me and a couple of my brothers in Christ are hoping to attend a Bible college or Seminary this Fall to get Biblical Study degrees and/or a Master of Divinity.  I’m not sure what God will do and how He’s going to work this out, but I’m excited about it and I’ve learned to get excited about the unknown…but not just the unknown, but the unknown that is known to God and the unknown that is driven by Him and my desire to follow Him.

This is so new to me because I’m not the type that lets go of things easily, and some of those things include my past.  I hold on tight to those memories, and sometimes I wonder if God will allow me to experience those again.  But, I have to ask myself if those things I hold dear to also hinder me from moving to the direction God wants to take me.  Am I allowing those things to make me less efficient for God’s use?

The one thing I know through all of this is that it never hurts to step out in faith…to do the things that I know God is directing me to do even though it isn’t comfortable or that I have to sacrifice some things to do it.  When you step out in faith, though, that’s when you can see God work around you and in you.  That’s tough ‘cause there’s that “unknown” thing again and you worry about the outcome.  Stop!  Stop worrying!  Allow God to use you and you’ll see how much your relationship with Him will grow.  Make yourself available to Him and you’ll see what kind of adventure He’ll take you on.  You don’t have to worry because He’ll bring others along the same journey…and those times when you feel like you’re all alone…He’s not too far off…He’s holding your hand.